Hangxiety: How to heal your post-party panic

I spent the whole damn day crying on the couch watching Hamilton. Have you seen it? It’s so good. Devastatingly good.

Of course, this emotional spiral came after three days of drinking—vacation vibes, right?

I’m not mad about it, but Sunday hit me like a freight train. My skin was crawling, my heart was racing, my brain was giving full-blown “everything is meaningless and you’ll die alone” energy. Classic hangxiety.

Apparently, I’m not alone—around 12% of people experience anxiety as a hangover symptom (we solidarity, bitches). Turns out, alcohol hijacks your brain’s chill with a flood of GABA, making you feel relaxed and soft and fun—but once it wears off, your brain overcorrects, pumping stress chemicals and speeding up your nervous system like a bat out of hell to restore balance.

Add a splash of cortisol and a racing heart and boom: you’re spiraling on your couch questioning your life while crying over founding fathers. Love that for us.

So, how to we combat Hangxiety?

Look, the most obvious answer is to just not get a hangover in the first place. I know. That means no drinking, or drinking in moderation- like real moderation (we’re talking 1-2 drinks max, not “moderation” like vodka in a green smoothie).

But if you’re still gonna let loose every now and again—because, hi, we’re human and life is weird—herbs can help. Especially ones that help bring your GABA levels back into balance so your brain doesn’t feel like a haunted house the next morning.

Herbal Allies for balance Hangxiety

• Lemon Balm: This is my go-to if I have to brunch the next day or do anything semi-social while recovering. Uplifting, mood-stabilizing, and slightly euphoric, she brings sunshine to a stormy brain.

• Passionflower: Perfect for when you’re vibing in the park, sunglasses on, pretending you’re in a Lana Del Rey music video. Calms racing thoughts and brings your nervous system back into a floaty state.

• Valerian: This is for the crashout days. When your only job is to be a couch potato and survive. Deeply sedating, grounding, and good for that “please shut my brain off” vibe.

• Kava: Honestly? My favorite alcohol replacement herb. Kava and alcohol act really similarly in the body—so much so, that I’ll take kava instead of drinking and feel like I’m vibing, minus the next-day doom spiral. But even if you’ve already overdone it, 2 dropperfuls of kava the next morning is the perfect reset.

What to do when herbs aren’t enough

Sometimes herbs work magic, and sometimes your body needs a few more tools in the kit. Here's what I turn to when I’m spiraling and need to come back:

• Be kind to yourself: Seriously. You are not a walking disaster. You are a human. Ask yourself: what would you tell a friend if they were feeling like this? Would you call them a failure? No. You’d probably hand them some coconut water and put on a playlist. Be that gentle with yourself.
• Meditate, breathe, ground: Close your eyes, take 5 to 10 deep breaths. Picture yourself somewhere soft—a beach, a forest, the arms of someone who makes you feel safe. Engage your senses. What are you hearing? Smelling? Tasting? Feeling? Remind your brain that you’re okay.
• Tell it to a tree: Saying it out loud is like a pressure release valve. Just remember this is temporary. The doomsday spiral is a trick. It will pass. It always does. You are not your thoughts. You are not your hangover.
• Phone a friend: Only if it helps! Sometimes walking through the night before with someone can calm the monster in your head. Like, oh- maybe I didn’t ruin everything forever. But don’t go fishing for guilt if it’s just going to feed the spiral. Check in with yourself first.
• Reflect, then redirect: You don’t have to beat yourself up. Feel the feelings, then do something else. Put on a funny show, organize your sock drawer, go sit in the sun. Don’t let your hangxiety become your personality for the day.

So yeah, I still drink too much on vacation sometimes. But now I have a plan. Because healing doesn’t mean being perfect- it means knowing what to reach for after the unraveling.

And sometimes, healing looks like Hamilton, herbs, hydration, and calling your best friend to say: “Okay, I’m spiraling. Tell me I didn’t ruin my life.”

I promise you, you didn't. You're just human.